Practice Mindfulness

“Meditation brings wisdom; lack of mediation leaves ignorance. Know well what leads you forward and what hold you back, and choose the path that leads to wisdom.” ~ Buddha

According to Wikipedia, meditation is a holistic discipline during which time the practitioner trains his or her mind in order to realize some benefit. The focus being to train the mind.

My definition of meditation is the practice of becoming present and centered. If you are anything like me, you have the very active monkey mind – where your thoughts swing to and fro. So, to try and sit still to meditate was not happening. Then I began doing mindfulness meditation. You can mindfully meditate while walking in nature, while walking your dog, while jogging, while doing the dishes. It is about being present without resistance or judgment.

I started serious meditation to relieve chronic pain. This morphed into gaining increased creativity, heightened awareness, more focus and concentration, and being able to make better decisions about my life. As the Buddha says, meditation brings wisdom while the lack of meditation leaves ignorance.

Make the Choice to Meditate

"Eventually, meditation will make our mind calm, clear, and as concentrated as a laser which we can focus at will. This capacity of one-pointed attention is the essence of genius. When we have this mastery over attention in everything we do, we have a genius for life itself: unshakable security, clear judgment, and deep personal relationships." ~ Eknath Easwaran

If the thought of meditating makes you cringe just a little, then re-define the way you do meditation. Personally, I could never sit still on my own to meditate. I would squirm, fidget, itch, and forget about my mind. There would be a full length feature film of my past and my future.

I truly wanted to meditate; I wanted to have that stillness and that moment of inner peace. So, I determined to see this through. I can now meditate for an hour at a time ~ still wanting more time. What was the catalyst to change?

Firstly, I made the decision to meditate. I could either choose to meditate or choose not to meditate.

Secondly, I changed my thoughts about meditation. It was no longer this big thing that I could not do. I simply did it five minutes at a time, with music or a guided imagery. Five minutes became ten minutes which became twenty minutes, finally moving to sixty minutes. There are many guided meditations from five minutes to sixty minutes. So seek out what would help you. And be consistent.

Train your brain for inner peace,

Meditate...On Purpose

Meditation is simply directed concentration, and involves learning to focus your awareness and direct it onto an object: your breath, a phrase or word repeated silently, a memorized inspirational passage, or an image in the mind's eye. The benefits of meditation are numerous, and include:

1. Helping lower blood pressure
2. Decreasing heart and respiratory rates
3. Increasing blood flow
4. Enhancing immune function
5. Reducing perception of pain and relieving chronic pain due to arthritis and other disorders
6. Maintaining level mood
7. Bringing awareness and mindfulness to everyday aspects of life

A simple form of meditation that can be practiced by anyone is to walk or sit quietly in a natural setting and allow your thoughts and sensations to occur; observing them without judgment.

~ From Dr. Andrew Weil

Focus... Concentrate... Meditate

Meditation is simply directed concentration, and involves learning to focus your awareness and direct it onto an object: your breath, a phrase or word repeated silently, a memorized inspirational passage, or an image in the mind's eye. The benefits of meditation are numerous, and include:

1. Helping lower blood pressure
2. Decreasing heart and respiratory rates
3. Increasing blood flow
4. Enhancing immune function
5. Reducing perception of pain and relieving chronic pain due to arthritis and other disorders
6. Maintaining level mood
7. Bringing awareness and mindfulness to everyday aspects of life

A simple form of meditation that can be practiced by anyone is to walk or sit quietly in a natural setting and allow your thoughts and sensations to occur; observing them without judgment.

~ From Dr. Andrew Weil

Wisdom from Napoleon Hill

A most beneficial use of time is silent meditation, while searching for guidance from within.

We all experience rare moments when a blinding revelation comes to us, when we suddenly see things differently than ever before. Usually, however, we learn the truth about ourselves gradually, over long periods of time, from quiet introspection. We are all spiritual, but some of us have learned to tap more effectively into the great strength that resides in the spiritual portion of ourselves. The spirit is not boisterous and noisy. Getting in touch with your spiritual self demands tranquility and solitude. Make sure you dedicate a portion of every day to thought and study, to think and reflect upon your life. Choose a time and place that best allow you to relax your mind and devote your thoughts to reflection.

I am an avid meditator; can begin or end my day without it. I know the benefits of taking that sacred pause to fall still and silent.

Getting in touch with your spiritual self demands tranquility and solitude. Make sure you dedicate a portion of every day to thought and study, to think and reflect upon your life.

Just for today, begin the practice of falling still, being silent and getting in touch with your spiritual self.

Meditation Brings Wisdom

“Meditation brings wisdom; lack of mediation leaves ignorance. Know well what leads you forward and what hold you back, and choose the path that leads to wisdom.” ~ Buddha

According to Wikipedia, meditation is a holistic discipline during which time the practitioner trains his or her mind in order to realize some benefit. The focus being to train the mind.

My definition of meditation is the practice of becoming present and centered. If you are anything like me, you have the very active monkey mind – where your thoughts swing here and there. So, to try and sit still to meditate was not happening. But the great thing is you don’t have to sit still; you can meditate while walking in nature, while walking your dog, while jogging, while doing the dishes. It is about being in the present moment while you are training your mind toward some benefit.

I started serious meditation to relieve chronic pain. This morphed into gaining increased creativity, heightened awareness, more focus and concentration, and being able to make better decisions about my life. As the Buddha says, meditation brings wisdom while the lack of meditation leaves ignorance.

3 Ways To Conquer Fears

Here is a wonderful article by my sister blogger, the rockin' ipopin Kirsten Harrell. Kirsten hangs out at Think Positive!

When fear creeps up, tune into one or all of these. I am a personal student of meditation and meridien tapping. Enjoy!

Everyone feels fear at some point in his or her life. Fear is a natural and useful emotion. Feeling afraid to pick up a poisonous spider, walk down a dark deserted alley in a high crime area, or walk across a busy highway keeps us safe. However, many people suffer from unnecessary and sometimes irrational fears. This type of fear can keep you from achieving your goals and enjoying life - especially if you have many fears. Some common fears include, spiders, snakes, terrorism, public speaking, dogs, and heights. If you are struggling with fears and you want to learn how to conquer them, I suggest 3 different paths you can try.

The western way – A tried and true approach to reduce and eliminate fears is to use the process known as systematic desensitization. This involves repeated and graduated exposure to the feared stimulus paired with relaxation techniques (deep breathing, guided imagery, progressive muscle relaxation, etc.). For example, if you are afraid of heights you might start by viewing a video taken from on top of a tall building and practice your relaxation techniques until you feel comfortable viewing this video. Once you can look at the video without any fear, you might try going to the top floor of a small building and looking out the window while practicing your relaxation techniques. Continue with these graduated steps paired with your relaxation techniques until you can go to the top of a tall building and feel comfortable. If you have intense fears, you will probably want to seek the support of a therapist to help you use this process.

The eastern way - Meditation can help you reduce your fear response. Scientific research has shown that meditation can change the brain and help reduce fear, anxiety, anger, and depression. Dr. Richard Davidson (University of Wisconsin) found that meditating helps increase activity in the left pre-frontal cortex (part of brain associated with happiness and positivity) and quiet activity in the amygdala and right pre-frontal cortex (parts associated with fear). Regular meditation can also help you connect with your inner resources that help you to feel more calm and confident. To start a meditation practice, I suggest that you start small – try for a few minutes each day and work your way to a length of time that works for you. Remember that meditation is NOT about stopping the brain from thinking! That is what the brain does by nature – it thinks. The key to meditation is to be aware of these thoughts (and they will come) and then bring your awareness back to the present moment.

East meets West - Tap, tap, tap your fears away with Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). There is evidence to support this new technique that involves acupressure combined with mental activities to reduce fear quickly and easily. EFT, a particular type of energy psychology, is showing great promise as a quick and efficient method to conquer fears. EFT involves simple stimulation of certain acupressure points in order to reprogram the energy system to have a new reaction to old fearful thoughts and stimuli. Tapping acupressure points while focusing on a fearful memory seems to deactivate areas of the brain that are involved in fear and pain. EFT is something you can learn from a book, the EFT website, or a practitioner and then practice on your own anytime you need it.

If fear is interfering with your life, there is hope. You don't have to simply put up with a life full of fear. Any of the above techniques can help you conquer your fear and move forward with your life feeling more calm, cool, and confident.


~*~*~*~
Coach Carolyn

Mind Control for Manifesting Peace

"Eventually, meditation will make our mind calm, clear, and as concentrated as a laser which we can focus at will. This capacity of one-pointed attention is the essence of genius. When we have this mastery over attention in everything we do, we have a genius for life itself: unshakable security, clear judgment, and deep personal relationships." ~ Eknath Easwaran

If the thought of meditating makes you cringe, then re-define the way you do meditation. Personally, I could never sit still on my own to meditate. I would squirm, fidget, itch, and forget about my mind. There would be a full length feature film of my past, present and future.

I truly wanted to meditate; I wanted to have that stillness and that moment of inner peace. So, I determined to see this through. I can now meditate for an hour at a time ~ still wanting more time. What was the catalyst to change?

Firstly, I made the decision to meditate. I could either choose to meditate or choose not to meditate.

Secondly, I changed my thoughts about meditation. It was no longer this big thing that I could not do. I simply did it five minutes at a time, with music or a guided imagery. Five minutes became ten minutes which became twenty minutes, finally moving to sixty minutes. There are many guided meditations from five minutes to sixty minutes. So seek out what would help you. And be consistent.

Train your brain for inner peace,

Coach Carolyn

Find Peace Inside

"All spiritual disciplines are done with a view to still the mind. The perfectly still mind is universal spirit." ~ Swami Ramdas

Getting into the habit of meditating, praying and/or resting daily helps us pull back from our preoccupation with the material world. In silence and solitude, we have an opportunity to pay attention to what’s happening inside rather than outside.

When we do this consistently, we learn to relax and to quiet and detach from our mental chatter and our turbulent emotions. As we begin to witness ourselves in personality, we also begin to experience our soul.

"Meditation may require a lifetime to master, but it will have been a lifetime well spent. ... If you want to judge your progress, ask yourself these questions: Am I more loving? Is my judgment sounder? Do I have more energy? Can my mind remain calm under provocation? Am I free from the conditioning of anger, fear, and greed? Spiritual awareness reveals itself as eloquently in character development and selfless action as in mystical states." ~ Eknath Easwaran

Brought to you by The Inner Journey.

Go inside and find peace,

Coach Carolyn

Re-Define and Re-Design Your 2009

To kick off 2009, fourteen fabulous women of passion and purpose gathered together to create their best year yet. I want to thank these women for taking their lives in their own hands and taking a proactive approach to manifest a spiritually abundant and prosperous year; and for hanging out with me, it was awesome!

“Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather must recog­nize that it is he who is asked. In a word, each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being respon­sible.” ~ Viktor Frankl from Man’s Search for Meaning

I heard this quote five o’clock this morning and jumped up to write this recap. The main point of our gathering was to realize that this one, wild and precious life is your life and as the author of that one, wild and precious life you hold the pen to write your story as you feel it in your heart. We are each born with our heart’s desire within and this journey is about re-acquainting ourselves with that desire. Through no fault of our own, we have been sold a bill of goods that was not for our good! We have been fed and programmed with everything other than our heart’s desire. We have inadvertently been led in every direction except the direction set by our own internal maps and guidance. Because of this, we do everything we can to try to get back to what we know deep within our hearts. Alas, most of our efforts are just not working.

“We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them.” ~ Epictetus

“We do not see the world as it is; we see the world as we are.” ~ Anaîs Nin

Any event, belief, or feeling has no meaning on its own, it just is. The only meaning it has is the meaning we assign it. Yet, we assign it a meaning that conforms to the confines of the boxes we have been placed in by our own world, conditions and circumstances. The meaning we assign something is what gives it life. From our childhoods, we have been dumped with a mirage of thoughts, ideas and emotions from parents, grand-parents, teachers, authority figures, and the media. Over the years, these thoughts, ideas and emotions solidified to form our belief systems. It is these belief systems that we base all our decisions and actions which produce the results we see in our lives.

When a new year approaches, our first thought is to have a better new year than the old ones. However, this is a lofty intention when we are creating more of the same because we are doing the same actions that lead to the same results. It is time to break this cycle of insanity. Remember insanity is doing the same thing over and over and over expecting a different result. One way to break this cycle of insanity is to assign new meaning to the circumstances in our lives. This year is about re-defining and re-designing our new year. Neuro-linguistic programming or NLP calls this reframing. Step out of your belief system to assign a new story to those areas that are not working in your life.

One example of this is my journey of menopause. Yes, I am in the elite club of women who experiences hot flashes, night sweats, irritability, and the plethora of symptoms that go along with this stage of life. All my life, I have heard nothing but negative comments around this time of life. I made the decision to re-define how I experience menopause. First, I took a workshop to find out about this mysterious phase. It was one of the best things I could have done for myself. I was amazed to learn that this “second life” is the wisdom stage, the time of life when women are more about “being” than “doing”. It is the time when we are more contemplative as opposed to more social. It is our quieting time. This led me to re-define how I experience menopause. There is nothing I can do to stop this process, so I may as well accept it with grace. I chose to see this time as a time where I can sit and be wise and not run around trying to prove myself. Well, my hot flashes and night sweats have lessened. Yes, I am more contemplative and solitary, making my social time with friends all the more rich and meaningful.

Look at one area of your life that is not working for you: relationships, finances, health, spirituality, fun and leisure, business and career. Within that area, list three things that are not working. Then think about the meaning you assign to those things. Are you approaching them with fear and drama, or with love and acceptance? Do you view them as something to dread instead of something to challenge and mature you? Do you look for the lessons and the blessings within each situation instead of only seeing it as a curse and problem?

Be Grateful
Live in a constant state of gratitude. Be grateful for everything. Remember, you are breathing, that is a blessing. Remember, there are women in this world who do not have the liberties and freedoms to do many of the things we take for granted. Remember, when you are stuck in traffic, that you have a car! Remember, when you have to wait on line, that you have feet to stand on. Be grateful for everything. When it is raining and snowing, you have shelter to keep you dry. When it is blistering cold outside, you have a warm place to lay your head. Remain in a constant state of gratitude. When you have an attitude of gratitude, you cannot have negative thoughts at the same time. Live in your blessings. Learn from the lessons. Both are always within reach.

Resources to Re-Define and Re-Design Your 2009
Here is just a few of the resources discussed in our gatherings. This list is by no means exhaustive.

Books
The Four Agreements – Don Miguel Ruiz
The Mastery of Love – Don Miguel Ruiz
The Voice of Knowledge – Don Miguel Ruiz
(You can get the 3-book boxed set from Amazon for a steal!)
As a Man Thinketh – James Allen
Think and Grow Rich – Napoleon Hill
Man’s Search for Meaning – Viktor Frankl
Loving What Is – Byron Katie
Ask and It Is Given – Jerry and Esther Hicks
Get The Life You Want – Richard Bandler
Change Your Life in 30 Days – Rhonda Britten
Fearless Living – Rhonda Britten
A Return to Love – Marianne Williamson
The Alchemist – Paulo Coelho
Spiritual Economics – Eric Butterworth
It’s Not About the Money – Brent Kessel
The Artist’s Way – Julia Cameron

Podcasts and iTunes
One of my greatest tools of leaning is my iPod. If you have one, use it to your greatest benefit, if you do not have one, you still have no excuse. Go to the Apple website and download iTunes, the program for purchasing, storing, listening and viewing audio and video materials. Whether you have an iPod or other mp3 player or not, you can still download the podcasts to listen to on your computer. Once you have installed the program, go to the iTunes store. From the menu on the left, click on Podcasts. Podcasts are fabulous; they are mini workshops, classes, lectures and sermons on just about any topic – all for free! Yes, we loooove free!

Some of my favorite podcasts; to find them just key in the search box under the Podcast category.

MorningCoach.com – one of the best personal development podcasts out there. It is 15 minutes of positivity to set your day and get you motivated. Also, visit the website, lots of great tools to create your best life. Hosted by J.D. Glossinger.

Neurolinguistic Psychology Podcast – for the newbies to NLP, this podcast is not only a great primer, but also has great tools and how-to’s. Hosted by Dr. Will Horton.

W.O.M.A.N.: A New Definition – this podcast is for women looking for holistic alternatives to health and well being. Host Gina Cloud is passionate about educating women on alternative methods and treatments for health related issues. I wrote her first review on the iTunes site!

I could go on, but I won’t! I warn you, once you get into podcasts, they are totally addictive. There is also iTunes U, as in University. There are full length courses coming from places like Stanford and Duke. Jump in and stay awhile!

Daily Affirmations
I receive at least a dozen daily emails of affirmations or some positive quote or saying to set the tone of my day. I collect the quotes in a Word doc to use in my writings, workshops and classes. I write the ones that really resonate in my daily planner.

Think Positive! Blog – Kirsten Harrell is one of my favorite bloggers and friends. She is a positivity and soul psychologist who delivers a daily affirmation called “ipopins” to lift you up. Kirsten’s warning: prolonged use of positive thinking may create a permanent positive attitude. I totally agree! Subscribe to her blog to get your daily ipopins in your inbox. It really sets my day. You can also purchase her “ipopins” as mp3s to take with you and listen when needed. Change your mind... change your life... one minute at a time!

Gratefulness.org – a non-profit organization dedicated to gratefulness, a universal principle that serves as the core inspiration for personal growth, cross-cultural understanding, interfaith dialogue, intergenerational respect, and ecological sustainability. Sign up for a daily email blast of gratefulness. Tons of quotes to remind us to be grateful!

Notes From the Universe – Another teacher from The Secret, Mike Dooley sends positive e-blasts to your inbox from the Universe. When you sign up, the more information you are willing to share, the Notes are more customized to fit your profile.

For spiritually and faith-based quotes and articles, check out Beliefnet.com. It also has an extensive section on prayer and meditation. You can sign up for daily email quotes of any faith.

Look Up and Lighten Your Life
Laughter is great for relieving negative energy and healing the soul. Go to YouTube, type in “Madea” in the search box, and listen to the wise-cracking wisdom of Tyler Perry’s alter ego. Not only will you laugh your um-hum off, but you will gain some wisdom in the process. Madea is raw, real, rude, and irreverent. Check out Madea’s Class Reunion, not only is it hysterical, the music and singing is top-notch!

It has been said that music calms the savage beast. Well, the savage beast lives right in our heads! So, listen to good music. And please check the lyrics! NO GANGSTA RAP if you want positive thinking! I have created a Prosperity Playlist on my iPod to listen to when I need a pick-me-up. Included are:

Footprints in the Sand by Leona Lewis
La Sagese by Sheila Chandra
You Raise Me Up by Josh Groban
My Saving Grace by Mariah Carey
I Hope You Dance by Lee Ann Womack
Singing My Song by Christina Aguilera
Go Light Your World by Jennifer Owens (I was just messin’ wit ya, J!)
* Jennifer is one of our faithful members and she has an amazing voice!

Also, watch what you let inside of your mind. Go on a news fast. Give up television news and newspapers. You’d be surprised how much you don’t miss! Listen to NPR’s 5-minute podcast on the hour. I listen once or twice a day, just to get the headlines. Please, I don’t need all the gory details of the latest shooting!

Also, I mentioned to the ladies about my nightly meditation practice which has made quite an impact in such a short time. The best time to work on our thoughts and our mind is when our minds are in its meditative state, the Alpha state. I have been using a program called the Alpha Mind Control from the Super Mind Evolution System to straighten out my stinking thinking! (Scroll all the way to the bottom of the page to sign up for the free Alpha Mind Control audio)

At bedtime, I listen to the meditation, and as I become somewhat drowsy, I take the opportunity to re-program my mind. I read my daily Action List for the following day; I read my 90-day intention which I would like to receive; and I do a creative visualization called the Prosperity Consciousness Exercise from Bob Proctor’s You Were Born Rich. Whatever that 90-day intention is, I visualize it as if I have already received it. I picture the entire scene with all the colors, smells, sounds, and senses.

And finally, for this post anyway, get yourself a Passion Partner. I have said this before and I am saying it again. Find someone who will challenge you, hold you accountable and love you to the fulfillment of your dreams. Please NOT A SIGNIFICANT PARTNER. This person has to be totally objective and willing to not just hear what you say, but LISTEN to you. Yes, there is a difference. You need constant support and encouragement, especially if you have more toxic people around you than you can stand. Hire a coach, find a mentor, and choose wisely. I have hired four new coaches and mentors this year because this is will be a slammin’ year and I am serious! It is time for you all to get serious about your lives.

If you have seen the movie or read “The Secret” then you are familiar with the wealth guru Bob Proctor. I have tapped into his wisdom and if you are ready to elevate your thinking, taking your mind and your abundance level soaring, Six Minutes to Success will change your life!

This was a long one, but I hope it will give you some guidance to re-define and re-design your 2009!

Be blessed and be a blessing!
Coach Carolyn

Using Spiritual Practices

Our Becoming a Woman of Purpose Meetup met last weekend. I want to say thank you ladies for coming out on a frigid afternoon, I appreciate you all.

We talked about spiritual practices ~ some tips on how to use them and some examples of specific ones. One very important tip is to just do it! It is not about being perfect, but being centered and at peace. This you will never accomplish if you just don’t start already! Never mind about how it looks or sounds to anyone else, this is your journey and your practice. It looks however you need it to look for it to work for you.

Another tip is to have no expectations. It is said that expectations are future rejections. When I expect someone to do something, and they do not; it is not the person that has let me down, but my expectation of them. Go into everything with an open heart and an open mind. This is critical for spiritual practices because when you have expectations, chances are something will come up that is not in line with what you expected. Then what? You give up because it didn’t go according to your plan. In the realm of the spirit, nothing goes according to your plan. This is an important lesson to keep handy. I can do the same practice two days in a row and each day presents something different. Why? Because I am different. I am feeling something different, I am experiencing something new and different, or I am just in a funky place at the time.

One of our newest members shared her spiritual practice of meditation. She remarked how centered and peaceful she feels once she has had her meditation time; and how empty she feels when she does not meditate. Another member shared that she creates vision boards and this is very calming for her.

There is no set practice ~ whatever you do to connect you with the divinity that is within you and outside of you is your practice. I shared my four main practices: prayer and contemplation; spiritual reading; silence and solitude; and journaling. I can definitely feel the effects when one or all of those practices go unchecked. For silence and solitude, I take myself on an Artist Date; just me, my journal and my pen. No friends, family or pets. No distractions, just time to be with yourself, to get to know yourself more.

If you are a newbie to spiritual practices, there are two sites that I have found to very useful: One is Beliefnet – whatever your belief system, this site will accommodate you. It offers prayers, meditations, news and views on all things of a spiritual and religious nature. The other site is Spirituality and Health, named for the magazine. Try one or both sites to jumpstart or spice up your spiritual practice.

I also shared a ritual I use for ending my day: every evening I do a self-inquiry of my day. I answer three questions:
*What have I learned today?
*What have I enjoyed today?
*What have I improved or contributed to today?

Then I list five things I am grateful for that day. Instead of going to sleep anxious and worried about the day or the next day, this sets the tone for restful and peaceful sleep. When you wake up, set an intention for your day.

What would you like the day to look like? Ex., a day full of peace-filled conversations with no drama!

How do you want to feel? I want to feel peaceful and grateful all day, not worried or stressed.

Also, if you have a petty tyrant, that special person whose job it is to constantly annoy you, set an intention that your petty tyrant won’t annoy you today. And if s/he does, it won’t bother you; you will remain in a state of peace and goodwill. It may sound hokey, but when done in the proper spirit, it does work and you will notice the difference. As a coach, teacher and speaker, I have many petty tyrants. Yet, I see them as my teachers ~ they are in my life to teach me something. Yet, I simply remain open and grateful for the lessons and the blessings that come. This is what consistently doing spiritual practices has taught me ~ to be more open and look for the light instead of expecting the darkness.

I would love to hear what spiritual practices work for you. Please share them with us.

In peace and gratitude,
Coach Carolyn

Purposeful Thought for the Weekend

Do we mindfully and purposefully practice meditation?

"We should be able to bring the practice of meditation into our daily lives. We need to discuss among ourselves how to do it.

• Do you practice breathing between phone calls?
• Do you practice smiling while cutting carrots?
• Do you practice relaxation after hard hours of work?

These are practical questions. If you know how to apply meditation to dinner time, leisure time, sleeping time, it will penetrate your daily life, and it will also have a tremendous effect on social concerns."

From Peace Is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life by Thich Nhat Hanh

Live mindfully,
Coach Carolyn