Blame: A Victim’s Playground

Our first limiting behavior this week is blaming. I cannot state enough how truly damaging this behavior can be. It absolutely keeps you living a small, sad existence and you will never show up as the divine bright light you truly are.

“All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you. The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for external reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration. You may succeed in making another feel guilty about something by blaming him, but you won't succeed in changing whatever it is about you that is making you unhappy.” ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

Wikipedia defines blame as: the act of censuring, holding responsible, making negative statements about an individual or group that their action or actions are socially or morally irresponsible, the opposite of praise.

Yes, we have all had something done to us or against us. As children, we were victims of our circumstances because we were not in control of our choices or our lives. Today, as mature adults, we do have control over the choices we make and I am here to tell you that everything is a choice. Even when you choose not to make a choice – it is still a choice!

I do not say condone or ignore poor or inappropriate behavior, but anything done to you was done in the past. You must forgive the past and move on; or you will never live a happy and peaceful present or future.

When you continue to blame someone or something outside of yourself, you are essentially giving away your power; which renders you powerless. Being powerless keeps you stuck in the role of victim; and in the grand scheme of life, there are no victims, only volunteers. When you continue to cast blame on something or someone outside of yourself, you are in essence signing up to be victim – that is the choice you are making; albeit an unconscious choice.

So, just for today, STOP, TAKE A BREATH, and ASK:

• What was my part in this situation?
• For what purpose have I attracted it into my life? (Remember, it takes two to tango!)
• What are the lessons and the blessings in this situation?

No More Victim Stories

This week, I would like to focus on a set of behaviors that I believe keeps us living very small lives and limits our becoming women (and men) of purpose. In order to gain mastery over these behaviors, we need to expose then and shine light on them. Only those behaviors brought into the light can be properly dealt with.

Although the list of limiting behaviors could get quite lengthy, I will only speak of four of them here this week. I do believe that once you have a grasp on these behaviors, you will be able to easily recognize them; thus gain awareness and clarity over why certain areas of your life become stuck and stagnant.

So, what are these limiting behaviors we will shine light on this week? They are blaming, complaining, criticizing and judging. Do you recognize any or all as too close a companion? Yes, we have all engaged in one or another at some point in our lives. And you may say there is a healthy time and place for them. Well, I call that justification – another limiting behavior that does not serve you.

What I want to get at here with these behaviors is that you are on a journey to a life of peace, passion and purpose. You are living your passions from your divine heart message, thus will you be at peace. And yes, you need other people to make it so. But the four limiting behaviors are more about not minding your own story, looking at another person’s behavior instead of dealing with your own, pointing the finger at someone else and not taking personal responsibility for your own unique and precious life. Put all of these together and your life is called victimhood.

This week, you will stop being a victim in your own life story and start being the divine creator you were created to be!