13 January 2008

Yes, Life is Difficult... Now What?

“You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them.” ~ Michael Jordan, basketball star

Throughout the course of my coaching practice, with individuals and groups, I often hear women say things like, “But it’s so hard!” or “That’s easier said than done.”

M. Scott Peck’s wonderful book The Road Less Traveled opens with the line, “Life is difficult.” So, my question as a coach is yes, life is difficult, now what? Okay, we have established that life is difficult, life is full of obstacles, challenges, disappointments, and upsets. That is a given. Life is about change – that nasty little concept that keeps rearing its ugly, yet necessary head.

The truth of the matter is that change is inevitable and life is difficult. We weren’t promised anything less. So my advice is to get over it! Accept the fact that life is filled with challenges and obstacles and either make the choice to journey through it or get out of the way of others who want to. If we just sit in the fact that everything is so hard, then we will never grow or progress as we were created to.

And here is the news flash: Everything is easier said than done! Everything! It is easier to just speak words of positive affirmation than to actually live them. It is easier to just say I want financial abundance than to take the necessary steps to make it so. It is easier to just speak out what I want my life to look like for 2008. Absolutely. But unless we take the action to make it so, yes, life will remain difficult and stagnate. Everything in life is easier said than done, everything takes a level of effort, commitment and action to make it a reality.

The word I hear very often associated with this is stuck, which simply means fixed or baffled. We have turned being stuck as an excuse to stand still and not move or act at all. I am about redefining our terms. Try seeing being stuck as a time to be still and ask some questions about the process; allowing you to then make one small step towards progress. Whatever we need to do to turn the difficulties of life into amazing opportunities for growth and creativity, then by all means do it! You are the author of your life. It is your story, write and rewrite as necessary.

Not that I am endorsing any product, but it would be great if we all went out and purchased one of the Staples Easy Button. When we are faced with a difficult decision or action to take, and we take one small step, we can press the easy button and hear, “That was easy!” Once we have taken one step, the second is not as hard. The tag line for the Easy Button says, "Don't stress it, press it!" Listen, the choice is yours.

Life, though difficult, continues to move forward. You are older right now than you were when you began reading this post. Stop wasting precious time that can never be retrieved. Make the conscious choice to refuse to wallow in the fact that life is difficult and that everything is so hard. Make the conscious choice and commitment to take the necessary action to create your best year ever!

Here’s to creating your best year ever!
Coach Carolyn


Claire Josefine said...

Thank you, Carolyn, for an inspirational reminder.

Much of what you say mirrors the advice I give in my books and talks, and to my clients. Life is so much richer, more fully lived, when we make conscious choices and refuse to let fear stop us.

I've just subscribed to your blog, and look forward to reading more of your writing!


Claire Josefine
author of The Spiritual Art of Being Organized and
Following Raven, Finding Ground: A Road Trip in Search of Home
Founder and moderator of the Simple and Sustainable Organizers Yahoo! group

Carolyn D. Townes, SFO said...

Thank you Claire for stopping by and subscribing. I am so pleased that my words resonate with you and your work. I love hearing from other empowering women doing this work. Looking forward to learning more about your work as well.
Peace and passion, Carolyn

deansguide said...


Hi Carolyn it's Dean Susan Hanshaw's partner. We just launched a blog to support our new business inner architect. Your topic on this post is so true.

Great advice and so simple to understand yet. . . it amazes me how people view their outer world and the power they perceive it to have over their lives.

Would you be kind enough to go check out Susan's new post on just this subject?

Her article http://innerarchitect.wordpress.com/2008/01/18/how-to-create-your-reality-step-1-the-paradigm-shift/

We would love to hear your feedback. Your blog looks great!
Best wishes for 2008

Dean Guadagni and Susan Hanshaw
inner architect

Carolyn D. Townes, SFO said...

Hey Dean, thanks for stopping by. Always love to read your feedback and thanks for them.

Congrats on the new blog! Will pop over and visit soon. Best of luck to you and Susan. Love you both!

Peace, Carolyn