31 March 2010

Your Authentic Story

Only people who are doing something that goes against their own sense of right and wrong have to spend time and energy spinning out a self-justifying story.” ~ From Bonds That Make Us Free by C. Terry Warner

Now that the BWP Community is into creating and living out new stories, one of the first steps is to ask yourself, “Who am I?” Your new story should come from your core essence, your true self, the person you were before you bought into all the lies that formed your beliefs.

When you tap into your core essence, it is easy to create that new story – it is simply the real you. You won’t have to spend time spinning new stories to justify your false story when you live from your core essence. The true you, the authentic you will shine.

Just for today, STOP, TAKE A BREATH, and ASK:
“Who am I?”

Create a story from the answer you receive.
Coach Carolyn

30 March 2010

Leading Lady or Supporting Actor?

“To lead is difficult when you're a follower of fear.” ~ T.A. Sachs

One of my favorite movies is The Holiday. It has some great lines, one of which says that while you are the leading lady in your life, you behave like the best friend – another words, you are living life like you are a supporting character in your own life.

If this is your story, then it is time to start writing a new script. To be a leading lady means you lead with conviction and courage, not following fear and doubt. One way to tell if you are the supporting character in your life instead of the leading lady is to look at what is showing up in your life. Are you getting vague, murky, and unclear messages, then STOP, TAKE A BREATH, and ASK:

“What message am I sending out to the universe?”

Then, notice what you are saying and reacting to. Are your words filled with power and conviction, or are they weak and filled with fear?

What you give is what you get back.

Coach Carolyn

Check out the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program if you are more supporting role than leading lady.

29 March 2010

One Size Does Not Fit All

“Life would be much simpler if there were something out there that was always guaranteed to work, but one size doesn’t fit all.” ~ Peggy McColl

In all my years of studying and teaching spiritual principles and personal development, I have yet to see something presented consistently across the board. Everything has different flavors, nuances, and points of view. It is the same with personal likes and dislikes. One person may absolutely resonate with someone, while another person cannot stand them.

My point is that one size does not fit all. It is important to try things out for yourself to see if they fit your personality and temperament. You wouldn’t walk into a shoe store and purchase three pairs of shoes without first trying them on – unless you are absolutely familiar with the brand. Different brands cut their clothing differently as do different teachers. This does not make it right or wrong; it just makes it available to those who resonate.

Don’t discount something because it is not what you have heard before. Perhaps you need to hear a different point of view on the same issue. This is keeping an open mind; and for myself, it has made all the difference.

Try everything on for size and see what fits you!
Coach Carolyn

26 March 2010

Your Weekend Point to Ponder

So, ponder this point:

“Your close relationships are either a catalyst for manifesting what you really want, or they’re a hindrance to your manifestation. If you truly value the power of love in your life, you owe it to yourself to discover how to tap into the power of your relationship as a force for manifestation.”
~ Drs. Kathlyn and Gay Hendricks

Remember, you are the average of your five closest friends.

How does that make you feel?

Make it a manifesting weekend!
Coach Carolyn

Don't forget the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program if you are finding fear getting in the way of your manifesting the life you truly desire.

25 March 2010

How Confident Are You?

“When you are unsure of yourself, remember that you can always borrow a self-confident attitude from your authentic self. If we act as if we’re confident, we become so.” ~ Sarah Ban Breathnach

One of the stumbling blocks to being confident is fear. I have spoken quite a bit on this blog about fears and how they keep us from living a passionate and purposeful life. Fears block our confidence. Just imagine the things you would try if fear did not limit you.

A building block to living a confident life is gratitude, again an old friend of this blog. Living in an attitude of gratitude opens the door to abundance giving you the confidence to live a life free of negativity.

To be a confident woman, you must make the conscious choice to not attend every pity party, anger-fest, and offensive gathering that you are invited to. Just say, “Thank you for sharing; I choose not to receive that.” And move on. No need to give further explanation; which only leads to further confrontation.

We were given an awesome power – the power to choose. Yet, sometimes we do not exercise that power wisely. Stopping is a spiritual action. When we are in the midst of a major or even a not so major decision, stop, take a breath, and then choose. And remember, making no choice, is also a choice.

Make the choice to live an amazing and confident life.
Coach Carolyn

If fear is stopping and blocking your confidence, then it is time for you to decide to choose confidence over fear by joining the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program. Take back your confidence.

24 March 2010

Feeling Peace?

"We can never obtain peace in the world if we neglect the inner world and don't make peace with ourselves. World peace must develop out of inner peace." ~ The Dalai Lama

Are you at peace with yourself? If you are not, then you are at war with yourself – and this is not a healthy place to be. Perhaps it is time for you to STOP, TAKE A BREATH, and ASK:

"Am I feeling peace right now? If not, why not?"

Then just sit with the questions. Just notice what you are feeling. Whenever any unsettling feelings creep up, they creep up to deliver a message. Yet, we are not conditioned to properly handle unsettling feelings, so we ignore or deny them, hoping they would just go away. Well, they might go away for now, but as the Terminator said, “I’ll be back!” And, yes they will.

Coach Carolyn

If one of your unsettling feelings that you are trying to hide is fear, then this is your time to begin dealing with your fear. Get some mentoring in the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program. It’s fast and easy and you can participate from the comfort of your home or office.

23 March 2010

More Faith in Your Fear?

“Fear is faith that it won't work out.” ~ Sister Mary Tricky

Are you living in fear or living in faith? Even if you think you are not a religious person, I am speaking of the faith with a small f; and everyone has faith in something. Most of you have more faith in your fear than you do in your faith. If this is confusing, think about what you do have faith in. You have faith that when you walk out of your home, you will get to your destination. You usually don’t question whether or not you will get to where you want to go – you just go!

This works because you don’t place any drama around it; you simply believe you will get to your destination, especially if you are determined to get there. This ought to go for your dreams as well. Your dreams are someplace you want to get to. But you place more faith in your fear than in your dreams. Make the conscious choice to put your faith in your dreams and don’t allow fear to stop you from living your dreams.

Coach Carolyn

Join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program if you have more fear than faith, and watch your life shift and soar!

22 March 2010

Making Excuses?

“Some people have thousands of reasons why they cannot do what they want to, when all they need is one reason why they can.” ~ Willis R. Whitney

Are you making excuses for not doing what you know you are here to do? Are you constantly making excuses? Excuses are nothing more than exits. Once you make an excuse, you close the door on all possibility and potential.

Instead, take 100% responsibility for your life and step up to the plate. If there is something you know you need to do, stop making excuses for not doing it. It would probably take less effort to just do it than to keep coming up with all those excuses.

Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure.” ~Don Wilder and Bill Rechin

No one ever excused his way to success.” ~Dave Del Dotto

Show up and step up!
Coach Carolyn

If fear is your reason for making excuses, then take 100% responsibility for your life. Join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program today. Stop making excuses and start making a life!

19 March 2010

Friday’s Purposeful Question

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions.” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke

When was the last time you just let something go without taking it personally?”

“A prudent question is one half of wisdom.” ~ Francis Bacon

Have a rockin' weekend!
Coach Carolyn

Don't let fear or anxiety spoil your days! Join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program and live a life of ease and peace!

18 March 2010

Everything Is Not About You!

In a recent class I am teaching, we were discussing our emotions and in particular, anger. One of the students mentioned that it is so hard not to get angry when someone says or does something to offend us. I quickly mentioned Don Miguel Ruiz’ The Four Agreements. Surprising, many of them had never heard of the book. Although, this should come as no surprise, considering how people show up in the world – totally offended, feeling betrayed, being hurt, getting slighted in some way.

Now, I am not negating that these can all be very hurtful experiences, but you cannot allow that to rule your life.

Don’t Take Anything Personally

Remember, nothing anyone else does is about you; it is a reflection of their own drama. If you choose to make it about you, then on some level you are agreeing with their assumptions. And yes, that is a choice. We live in a very narcissistic society where we think everything is about us. Well, it’s not! The only things that are about us, are the things we sign up for. So, if we sign up for someone else’s drama and negative behavior, then it becomes our drama and negativity.

I choose to write my own story and leave the drama on the cutting room floor! When I want drama, I am creative enough to come up with some drama that will serve me – like getting knocked to the ground by Richard Armitage! Hell, I have gotten knocked to the ground before, it wasn’t fun and I was sore for days after. I did laugh about it after. But had that been Richard Armitage, well! I can come up with a least a dozen different scenarios about how that would have ended up! He he!

So, just for today, stop taking everything so personally – even if it has your name on it!
Coach Carolyn

Afraid to let go of the drama? It can be less scary to live the drama than to walk away from it. If this is your story, then the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program is for you! Join today!

17 March 2010

Being Right or Being at Peace

“If you don't meet resistance with resistance, it dissipates dramatically. It just softens. Try it! Next time somebody says to you, "I'm right, and you're wrong," say, "Pfftt, you're right. You are right. You're right." And mean it. In other words, don't mock them. Don't be sarcastic. "You're right." And then watch how, all of a sudden, their legs almost go right out from under them. They don't have the energy to blast you, because you just took the fuel away from the fire.” ~ Abraham

Sometimes you have to just STOP, TAKE A BREATH, and ASK:

“Would I rather be right or be at peace right now?

Choosing peace not only creates an environment of calm and serenity, but it sets you up as someone who is not ego-driven. When you are looking to be right all the time, it is simply your ego screaming for attention. And quite frankly, is that the type of attention you are really wanting? I would hope not.

So, just for today, choose peace rather than choosing to be right and perpetuating the conflict. You’ll be so happy you did!

Coach Carolyn

Sometimes we want to be right all the time out of a sense of fear and doubt. If this is your story, then it is time for you to join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program, and start living in peace.

16 March 2010

Think You Can... Think You Can't

I want to share a great message from author and teacher Mary Manin Morrissey. Enjoy!

Henry Ford once said, “If you think you can or you think you can't, you are right.” This is a very powerful statement but what's really powerful is when we practice remembering its power.

When we find ourselves thinking, "Oh I never have been able to" or "I can't" or "I used to be able to but now I can't", we are actually reinforcing a limitation. Our thinking is a gift from God and when we think in constriction we have cut ourselves off from God's power to give us ideas where the solutions can be found.

To tap into Universal power, we need to think into the solution. Just start by saying to yourself, “If I could do this, how might it work?” What ideas are there for how it could happen?

Let's remember what Henry Ford said and practice it today. If you think you can or you think you can't, you get to be right. So let's be right in thinking that it can be done. There is a solution and we can access it.

Just for today, think you CAN!

Coach Carolyn

Sometimes fear keeps us from truly believing that we can. Instead of allowing fear to interfere with your plans, join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program and learn to turn that fear to faith.

15 March 2010

BE, DO, HAVE A New Story!

At our BWP Meetup this past weekend, we worked on creating new and empowering stories; agreeing to thank our old stories for the lesson, blessings, and testings and then letting them go. It is difficult to give up our old stories just like it is difficult to let go of those old beliefs and thoughts.

In order to create a new life, you must create a new story because what you agree to, comes true for you. So to create a new life, you must agree to a new story.

How do you create a new story? The BE/DO/HAVE Questions!

BE - Who are you?
DO - What are you here to do?
HAVE - What do you want to have?

You need to get absolutely clear on these three questions. From this place, you can see what your values are. If you are a person with a spiritual foundation – there are certain things that you simply will not tolerate; it is easier to weed out what does not fit your values. Certain things simply will not show up in your field any longer.

You will discover how much freedom you have when you get absolutely clear on who you are becoming, what you are here to do and what is it you truly desire.

Dust off your journals and STOP, TAKE A BREATH, and ASK the BE, DO, HAVE Questions today! create your new story and begin to live your best life.

Coach Carolyn

Don't let fear, doubt and worry keep you from creating the story of your dreams. Join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program and get clear on your authentic self and let go of the fearful self.

12 March 2010

Friday's Purposeful Question

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions.” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke

“What’s the story you tell everyday?”

“You can tell whether a woman is clever by her answers. You can tell whether she is wise by her questions.” ~ attributed to Naguib Mahfouz

Have a fantastic weekend!
Coach Carolyn

Not too late to join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program. Click and join today!

11 March 2010

Making Choices

“Every choice has consequences, and a dream master is aware of the consequences. Making a choice can open many doors, and close many other doors. Not making a choice is also a choice that we can make. By making choices, we can master the art of dreaming and create the most beautiful life.” ~ From The Fifth Agreement by Don Miguel and Don Jose Ruiz

Remember, not making a choice is also a choice. You have the awesome power to make choices. Make conscious and deliberate choices. Take your time about making important choices; choices that will effect your life. It is okay to say to someone, “you know, that is an important question/request. I want to make the best decision, so I would like to take some time to pray about it.”

No one will tell you not to pray! And if they so, then that should give you a clue.

GRACE CARD: For every action there is a reaction. Choose wisely.

Coach Carolyn

Sometimes fear can stop you from making the best choices for your life. If fear is stopping you from living your best life, then sign up for my Transcending Fear Mentoring Program. It's a wise choice!

10 March 2010

Be Happy!

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Being happy and staying positive may help ward off heart disease, a study suggests.

U.S. researchers monitored the health of 1,700 people over 10 years, finding the most anxious and depressed were at the highest risk of the disease.

They could not categorically prove happiness was protective, but said people should try to enjoy themselves.

This makes so much sense! Be happy and have a happy heart!

"Happiness depends upon ourselves." ~ Aristotle

It costs you nothing to laugh and it is contagious!
Coach Carolyn

You cannot be happy when you are living in fear, doubt and worry. Change your life with the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program. It's a gentle program that guides you to changing your life by shifting from fear to faith.

09 March 2010

Are You Vibrating Fear?

“Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we have learned here. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of fear and the acceptance of love back into our hearts.” ~ Marianne Williamson

“You can never become a great man or woman until you have overcome anxiety, worry, and fear. It is impossible for an anxious person, a worried one, or a fearful one to perceive truth; all things are distorted and thrown out of their proper relations by such mental states, and those who are in them cannot read the thoughts of God.” ~ Wallace D. Wattles

“The one who fears something the most is the one who has it most activated in their vibration. And so, it is logical that they would experience it.” ~ Abraham-Hicks

'Nuff said.

Coach Carolyn

Don’t let fear take over your life. Learn how to use your fear to create more faith, freedom and flow. Join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program today!

08 March 2010

Dare to Dream...Then Dare to Act

"Don't let go of your dreams. If you have determination and belief in your dreams, you will succeed in spite of your desire to let go.” ~ Catherine Pulsifer

A man lay on his bed at the end of his life waiting to die.

His dream came to pay his last respects and bid farewell to the man who had never used it.

As it entered the room the man looked down in shame.

"Why did you not realize me?" the dream asked.

"Because I was afraid," the man said.

"Afraid of what," said the dream.

"I was afraid I would fail."

"But haven't you failed by not attempting to use me?"

"Yes I did, but I always thought there would be tomorrow."

"You Fool!" said the dream. “Did it never occur to you that there was only ever today; the moment that you are in right now? Do you think that now that death is here that you can put it off until tomorrow?"

"No," said the man, a tear gently rolling down his cheek.

The dream was softer now. It knew there were two types of pain: the pain of discipline and the pain of regret; and while discipline weighs ounces, regret weighs pounds.

Then the dream leaned forward to gently wipe away the tear and said, "You need only have taken the first step and I would have taken one to meet you, for the only thing that ever separated us was the belief in your mind that you couldn't have me.”

Then they said goodbye and they both died.

~ Anonymous

"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it." ~ Goethe

Dare to live your dreams!
Coach Carolyn

If fear is preventing you from realizing your dreams, then why not join my Transcending Fear Mentoring Program today? Don't die with your dream still inside you.

05 March 2010

A Note from the Universe

I want to share my Note from the Universe with you. If you don't already get your daily Notes, check out Mike Dooley's site and sign up. They always put a smile on my face.

"What if the coolest person on the planet didn't know they were the coolest person on the planet? Just because of a few self doubts, a few trace fears, or the occasional twang of inadequacy. Or because they somehow thought fame, or wealth, or popularity mattered. Or because they just didn't know the effect they had on others.

"It would be a pity, huh? An absolute travesty. And of course, telling them wouldn't achieve much because they'd never believe you. Never. They'd be too modest to accept it. Too naïve to believe it. And too cool to think it mattered.
So... well... ah... let's just leave it at that - The Universe

"Please, think as highly of yourself as you possibly can. Because no matter how high that is you will still undershoot the truth... it's just a time-space thing.

Okay, you know where I am going with this, don't you? What if this person was YOU?
Have a splendifferous weekend!
Coach Carolyn

Yeah, I am sure you caught the part about trace fears. Don't let them get you down; join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program today!

04 March 2010

Words of Wisdom

"Those who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed." ~ Lloyd Jones

"The only failure which lacks dignity is the failure to try." ~ Malcolm F. MacNeil

"A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him." ~ David Brinkley

The fourth agreement: Always do your best!

Coach Carolyn

To do your best, you must first be your best! Join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program today.

03 March 2010

First BE to Create Inner Peace

Buddhist monk and mystic Thich Nhat Hanh once said, "To be loved means to be recognized as existing."

What a truly profound insight. How many of us are walking around in a daze, in a psychic fog, and not really existing.

When we are not being who we were created to be, we are not existing.

When we are not doing what we were called to do, we are not existing.

When we are not experiencing or expressing joy, we are not existing.

The word “exist” comes from the Latin which means “to stand forth,” to exist means to be.

Who are you being? In order to create the life you were truly meant to live, you must first BE. Without being, what's the point of doing and having? Start existing. Before you can be loved, you must first be.

Create inner peace, just BE!

Coach Carolyn

No one has to tell a butterfly to just be! It just be!

Is fear keeping you from being your authentic self? If so, join my Transcending Fear Mentoring Program and find your true self and start being!

02 March 2010

Setting Boundaries to Reduce Fear

"Don't let someone else's opinion of you become your reality." ~ Les Brown

This past weekend about a dozen of our rockin' women of purpose came out to celebrate our third anniversary as a community of women on the journey. It was truly a magical experience. In spite of the fact that the city just got dumped with two feet of snow - give or take an inch or two in some spots - we gathered together to share stories, laugh together, encourage and empower one another and EAT! I was pleasantly surprised at all the delicious delicacies that were placed on our table.

One of the wonderful takeaways from the gathering was about not allowing other people's opinions to influence one's dreams. I thought this was stellar. We work so hard at setting up our boundaries, yet we forget that other people's opinions are one of the greatest boundary invaders. When we allow someone else's opinions to influence our thinking, we might as well turn over our lives to them and not live it. We are in fact living their life, their story, their dream and their drama - which has absolutely nothing to do with us. We have our own story, our own dreams and intentions, and our own opinions of what that all will look like.

When we allow our boundaries to get trampled upon in this way, fear is sure to creep in from around the corner. Why? Because we are not being and doing what is authentic to us. We are living someone else's story. And how scary is that?

Remember my post on Transcending Fear with I AM statements? Well, if you missed it, you can catch it again here. But check the term: I AM! This is about ME; and not about YOU! Keep affirming to yourself your I AM statements, because this reminds you of living in your own authentic story; stay out of other people's drama.

May the light go on with this one. And if it doesn't; check your bulb!

Coach Carolyn

Fear has all sorts of ways to keep you from living your best life. Don't let fear be your guiding force, join the Transcending Fear Mentoring Program. You'll have lots of light bulb moments!

01 March 2010

All You Have Is All You Need

"Everything you need you already have. You are complete right now, you are a whole, total person, not an apprentice person on the way to someplace else." ~ Wayne Dyer

One of my favorite songs is by author and speaker Sarah Ban Breathnach, called "All We Have Is All We Need." Sarah is the author of the famous "Simple Abundance" books and journals. She then wrote a collection of songs to accompany her Simple Abundance Journals. Splendid! Well, I play this song at the opening of my Women in Transition Monthly Spiritual Circles. I play it because it speaks to so much of our longings and struggles.

We tend to believe or have bought into the lie that if we just get that one more thing, we will be enough, have enough or accomplish what we truly want to accomplish. As the song says all we have is all we need. We have everything within to accomplish everything that we truly desire. We need nothing outside of us. We look at others and think they have it all together, and if I just had this one more thing, I could be in their league. Well, let me tell you something: they are more than likely looking for that one more thing as well.

You are more than enough. All you have is enough. All you need is within you.

So, say this with me:
"I am more than enough."
"All I have is enough."
"All I need is within me."

Feel into these statements. Turn them into your daily affirmations. Journal about them, especially if you are feeling hesitant about them. Give yourself permission to be your best self. After all, it's who you were truly created to be.

"Who you really are is enough." ~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Here's to being your best self!
Coach Carolyn

If fear is keeping you from living your best life, please consider joining my Transcending Fear Mentoring Program. It's easy to join and you can participate from the comfort of your home or office.