27 June 2008

Dealing With Fear and Negative Self Talk

“NOW is the operative word. Everything you put in your way is just a method of putting off the hour when you could actually be doing your dream. You don't need endless time and perfect conditions. Do it now. Do it today. Do it for twenty minutes and watch your heart start beating.” ~ Sam Ewing

Is what you are consistently saying to yourself contributing to your fears? Are you allowing your negative self talk to dictate your life and sabotage your dreams? Are your fears being fueled by the energy of your negative inner chatter? If you have answered “yes” to any or all of these questions, then it is time to re-write your inner script and re-design your life.

Remember when you were a child. You had no worries and no cares. Everything was taken care of for you. You just played happily, knowing that somehow all of your needs would be met. You were also fearless. You could tackle anything. You even had to be taught to avoid the clear and present dangers, like animals that could harm you. So, what happened? Well, you grew up! And in growing up, you were conditioned against what you instinctively knew – that you are fearless! That fear is merely a stepping stone to a new adventure.

In some of our popular children’s stories, Alice was not afraid to go beyond the looking glass; the children of Narnia could not wait to see what adventures were in back of that huge bureau. Children are naturally curious and full of wonder and awe. As we grow up, we have lost that sense of wonderment and awe. We have lost our natural spirit of curiosity, replacing it with the spirit of trepidation. That natural spirit of curiosity is what sparked our passions and helped fueled our dreams, creating the adults we are today. Yet, somewhere along the way, the spark has dulled and dimmed and so has our sense of wonder.

As adults, we seldom, if ever, allow our eyes to widen and our voices to squeak, “Ooooh!” We have stopped asking questions. I remember as a child, I would drive my mother crazy because I would ask a question, then upon hearing the answer would ask, “Why?” I kept this up until my mother, in utter frustration, would very firmly say, “Because I said so!” We have lost this childlike curiosity of asking questions; and have taken up the unfortunate habit of talking to ourselves in the negative.

Daily Practice:
When you hear the negative inner chatter, simple stop, take a breath and ask yourself: “What am I feeling right now?” Then simply wait for the answer. Don’t force anything. Don’t get impatient or frustrated if you do not receive an immediate answer. Remember, the answers are within you, they have become blocked by the toxicity of daily life. You need to create practices to clear the toxicity away.

“Perfection consists not in doing extraordinary things,
but in doing ordinary things extraordinarily well.”
~ Angelique Arnauld, Abbess of Port-Royal

1 comment:

Bruce K. said...

I appreciate your post about self-talk. We just posted our "Watch What You Think" video on Youtube that conveys a similar message in an eye catching way, thanks to our animated 'energy orbs.' You can find the video at:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-aiJk5J76Y