16 December 2009

Choose Peace in Friendships

"It's better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates whose behavior is better than yours, and you'll drift in that direction." ~ Warren Buffett

The late Jim Rohn taught that we are the average of our five closest friends. Think about the five people you spend the most time with. Stop, take a breath and ask yourself:

Are our conversations positive and uplifting or negative and draining?

Can I be my authentic self around them?

Do they support and encourage me no matter what, or are they naysayers and bring me down most of the time?

As the year winds down, take some time to do some serious self-reflection. Move into 2010 with a new outlook on your life. Let go of the shackles and lighten your load.

And I am talking about your five closest friends; those people you have chosen to be in your life, in your inner circle. We cannot help our family members, work colleagues and superiors but we do have choice over the quantity and quality of time we spend with them. Spend only time with them permitted by work or family gatherings; and only share with them the parts of your life related particularly to them. You don’t have to tell everyone you are thinking of starting a business, especially if they will not give you the support and encouragement you need.

It’s all about choice. You have the power to choose peace or confusion. You have the power to choose your friends as well. It doesn’t matter if you have known them since the year of the flood; if they are toxic, then it’s time to renegotiate that friendship. We always worry about offending someone or hurting someone’s feelings. Yet, we are prepared to get beat up at every turn. Living an authentic life means you have the peace you were born with, and can access that peace especially when things get heated.

Having grown up in drama, I made the decision that the only drama I wanted in my life was on a movie screen and I could walk away from it after the credits roll. I made that choice, and it has made all the difference.

It’s your life, and you only get one; but if you work it right, one is all you need!

Coach Carolyn

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