09 September 2010

Are You An Unpaid Critic?

Our next limiting behavior is criticizing. Okay, I know you never criticize, or rather, you offer constructive criticism. I think that is one of the slickest yet insidious ways to mask criticism. Unless, you are paid to give a critique – then keep it to yourself! This is my rule of thumb. Yes, but what if someone asks me? Turn it back on them.

When we judge or criticize another person, it says nothing about that person; it merely says something about our own need to be critical.” ~ Author Unknown

I am speaking of criticism as expressing disapproval by pointing out faults or shortcomings. My favorite is when someone will ask about an outfit – knowing full well what the answer will be and, they already have their own mind made up about it. Most of us have fallen into this trap. Why bother to ask? Because most women, not all, but most, have grown up with the very low sense of self. They don’t rely on their own opinion so they seek out the opinion of others. Or, they need the approval of others before they make a move.

When I say turn it back on them, I simply mean to ask them if they like and feel comfortable with the outfit, the decision, or whatever it is – and if they do, then go for it! The bottom line is to offer criticism only when asked for and then do the truth in love. You don’t have to say, “Good God, you look absolutely hideous in that thing!” Just say if you like and feel comfortable, then go for it!

After saying this, don’t go out and buy a Tee shirt that says, “I couldn’t talk her out of that ridiculous outfit!” Not cool!

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